Independent: Shit happens.
Democrat: Shit is a
vast right-wing conspiracy.
Republican: The rich deserve more shit.
Moderate: We must also consider shit’s right to happen.
Liberal: Shit will happen if we don’t spend enough.
Conservative: The courts have allowed too much excrement.
Reform: We can’t get our
poop in a group.
Socialist: Support the equal distribution of shit.
Communist: Come the revolution, shit will not happen again.
Libertarian: Legalize all kinds of shit.
Green:
Compost happens.